Love in Raising Troubled Teens

Unconditional love is necessary for raising children, at any age … and especially in adolescence. Although love at this stage is different from when children are younger, it becomes a harder, more authoritative love. This love has a very clear message for teenagers: “I know you don’t like what I’m going to do or say, but I’ll do it anyway because it’s good for you and I love you.”

It’s not authoritative parenting

This kind of love for raising troubled teens is confused with authoritarian parenting but has nothing to do with it. Authoritarian parents use harsh discipline without taking their children’s feelings into account … they just want their children to obey without caring about the values ​​they transmit to them.

Love in raising troubled (or trouble-free) teens should be warm and empathetic, though it is not without clear boundaries and consequences that are applied as a way to teach life’s lessons and the most important values ​​to learn.

This type of love is used to help a child be more responsible for his behaviour. Instead of doing things for him, giving him too many chances, or keeping him from suffering the consequences of his actions, this love helps him experience the consequences of his own behaviour.

This may mean setting strict limits and creating consequences that teach life lessons, or it may involve children having natural consequences for their behaviour. Either way, the intention should be to ensure that children understand that you are willing to do whatever it takes to help them improve.

Natural consequences

This type of love has some basic principles that must be known. The general idea of ​​this type of love is that parents love their children enough to set firm limits and follow appropriate consequences when the adolescent breaks the rules. Troubled teens sometimes make poor decisions; in this case, a parent may let their child face the natural consequences of their behaviour.

Responsible for their  behaviour

Another important principle of this kind of love in raising teenagers is that they must learn to be responsible for their behaviour. This means that you have to make sure that your children are responsible for the decisions they make at any given moment.

Parenting Strategies

It is important that you follow these strategies if you are the parent of an adolescent child with problems (or without them …). These strategies will help you better direct your children’s behaviour:

  • Let your child see your love even if you stand firm when he needs discipline.
  • Seek professional help when necessary.
  • Set and consistently enforce (real) expectations and reasonable limits.
  • Respect your teenager as a person; he is going through major changes as he is becoming an adult.
  • Take control if your child is creating a dangerous or unmanageable situation at home.

Remember that your adolescent son, even if he tries to show that he wants to be an independent person from you… he is still very dependent, and he needs you to guide him on this path of life.

Is your child bored at school?

It is not uncommon for children to complain from time to time that school is boring. Usually, what they are telling you is that they don’t like the subject or skill they are currently learning or that they prefer to have less study time and more playtime. This is normal in all ages; nobody likes having to do things out of obligation! Although in life, to move forward, you have to do 50% without much desire …

Reasons for school boredom

Some parents come to the conclusion that their child is bored because he is gifted, they believe that the job is too easy for him, and that is why he is bored. Other parents think that it is the failure to present the material in a way that engages the students that make their child bored, they hide behind phrases like: ‘that teacher does not know how to do things well’. While both are valid assumptions, they are not the only reasons kids get bored at school.

Some reasons for boredom at school can be:

  • Little challenge. Children need to feel a certain challenge in school in order to have the curiosity necessary for good learning. Teachers need to find a way to attract the attention of their students in each of their classes so that children can feel the necessary challenge within their minds… If so, they will not miss a moment of explanations!
  • If your child hasn’t established a comfortable relationship with anyone at school, they may feel like they have nowhere to turn when they need help with any area. That, in turn, can cause you to tune out, making you feel like you’re “bored.” What really happens to you is that you have the need to connect with others and stop disconnecting from your environment.
  • Whether it is because your child has learning disabilities caused by a disability or because he has not been taught in the way that best suits his learning style, it is necessary to take this into account to remedy.

Children spend many hours in school, and it is necessary that they feel good within the educational centre so that they can advance both personally and academically.